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The Tic Tac Toe Grid That Reveals What's Missing From Your Life — The Box Of Traits Explained
There is a grid inside your name that works like an owner's manual for your life. Numerologist Raymond Durr breaks down the box of traits — a nine square grid built from the letters in your full birth name that shows your strengths, your weaknesses, and the energies that were never around you growing up. The numbers that show up the most are your muscles. The ones that are missing are your karmic lessons. And once you know what's missing you can finally start building what was never there. This is one of the most practical tools in numerology and most people have never heard of it.
Takeaways:
- The box of traits is built from the letters in your full name at birth — each letter maps to a number one through nine
- The numbers that appear most in your name represent your natural strengths
- Missing numbers point to energies that were never present or modeled for you growing up
- A missing number is not a weakness — it's your greatest area of potential growth
- Calling it a weakness triggers people — the better frame is where your greatest strength is waiting to be built
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Transcript
Yeah, that would make a difference as well.
Speaker A:Yeah, right.
Speaker B:Didn't you say, well, wouldn't the lack of one energy be a lack of masculine?
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:Which would hint at my father.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:So if I'm looking at a person's like, this would show me.
Speaker A:Was your father, like, did you have any older brothers around?
Speaker A:Maybe you didn't have any older brothers around.
Speaker A:You didn't have.
Speaker A:Maybe you didn't have a father around.
Speaker A:If they was there, they just weren't very present.
Speaker A:Because again, energy attracts energy.
Speaker A:Attracts energy.
Speaker B:Yeah.
Speaker A:So if you don't have a lot of.
Speaker A:If there's not a lot of one energy around, it just indicates that you're.
Speaker A:That that energy wasn't present or there wasn't a lot of influences or you didn't have that positive male influence around, like I had my grandfather.
Speaker A:But I give that energy to the number nine and the number seven, because those are the both spiritual numbers.
Speaker B:So what you talking about now?
Speaker B:Does that relate to that tic tac toe board you had up there with the numbers in it?
Speaker A:Yeah, so the tick.
Speaker A:Yeah, so, yeah, so that goes.
Speaker A:I use that based off the full.
Speaker A:I use that based off the full name at birth.
Speaker A:All right.
Speaker A:Based off the letters that are missing from the name.
Speaker A:Right, so.
Speaker A:And also, again, seeing how a person may react more from a physical, mental, emotional, or spiritual or intuitive standpoint, but based off the numbers that are missing gives insights onto, you know, the person's weakness, for lack of a better words.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker A:All right, but, yeah, but, yeah, so the name.
Speaker A:So when it.
Speaker A:So when you start looking at the name, you get a lot more, especially when it comes to the actual person.
Speaker B:All right, I got a question for you.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker B:Which one you like more, dealing with the birth date or the name?
Speaker B:You like breaking down the birth date or breaking down the birth name.
Speaker A:It's easier to break down the birthday.
Speaker A:It's easier for the break.
Speaker A:I like looking at the name because the name makes me.
Speaker A:The name gives me, like, I can.
Speaker A:I can find out more when.
Speaker A:When it comes to the name, because there's just one.
Speaker A:I can see that the letters that are present, but also what the letters are missing.
Speaker A:But then I also meant by the name, I also able to find.
Speaker B:Your.
Speaker A:Soul number and also your personality number.
Speaker B:So you know what?
Speaker B:Sometimes when people find out I'm in astrology and all of that stuff, man.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker B:People hesitate to give me their birthday.
Speaker B:Sometimes they'd be like, I want to give you my birthday.
Speaker B:But if somebody tell you their name.
Speaker B:Yeah, that's all you need?
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:Oh, yeah.
Speaker A:All I need is your first name.
Speaker A:And.
Speaker A:Yeah, and I could find out.
Speaker A:I can find out just enough.
Speaker A:Could.
Speaker B:Could you just do somebody's first and last name and not know their middle name?
Speaker B:And.
Speaker B:And you know.
Speaker A:Yeah, yeah, I would probably use.
Speaker A:I would.
Speaker A:See, that's the thing.
Speaker A:That's where I would probably use the Chaldean system for that one.
Speaker A:Because if the person just.
Speaker B:The first and middle name, the first and last name.
Speaker A:Yeah, because if that's.
Speaker A:That might be the name that they tend to go by by.
Speaker A:They might have a middle name, but they don't want to tell you your middle name.
Speaker A:But if you tell me your first and last name, then I'll probably use the Chaldean system because the.
Speaker A:Use the, you use the Pythagorean system just for the full name at birth.
Speaker A:Use the Chaldean system for nicknames, aliases, the names that you actually go by, the name you want, the name you're most known by.
Speaker A:Even when it comes to, like, your social media handles.
Speaker B:Why do you switch from Pythagorean to Chaldean?
Speaker A:Because you're from.
Speaker A:Everything that I've studied is that you're supposed to use the Chaldean when it comes to name changes.
Speaker A:But I like using the Pythagorean system because.
Speaker A:For the full name at birth.
Speaker A:And that's because, I mean, it's just how I was taught.
Speaker A:And the thing is, if, if I hadn't, I studied it on myself.
Speaker A:So with me studying it myself, I definitely feel that it still resonates.
Speaker A:Using both just allows me to really.
Speaker A:Again, if I'm doing a reading for someone, I'm going to see which one most applies.
Speaker A:But.
Speaker B:Mentor, did you have a question when it came to that, when it comes to the Chaldean and the Pythagorean, which one do you.
Speaker B:Do you see that, like, there's more accuracy with either or.
Speaker A:My, from my, from my experiences.
Speaker A:No.
Speaker A:So this is what I.
Speaker A:So I most likely use the Pythagorean system.
Speaker A:I mean, the Chaldean system, let's say if it's a woman, once she changes over, once she changes her last name, then I'll use the Chaldean system because that's a name change.
Speaker B:All right, what about.
Speaker B:And you said nicknames too.
Speaker A:Nicknames too.
Speaker B:All right.
Speaker B:All right.
Speaker A:Yeah, nicknames too.
Speaker A:So like, even.
Speaker A:So this is my thing.
Speaker A:So when I.
Speaker A:So let's just go down to Ray, right?
Speaker A:People like to call me Ray.
Speaker A:So if I do it in just Calden, if I do it in just Pythagorean, it adds up to the number 17, which is number 8.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:Which would make, which does make sense because the number eight is all about finances, it's all about the business mind, it's about power, it's about leadership and authority.
Speaker A:Well, people started calling me Ray when I started working at different jobs, again associated with money.
Speaker A:So that's how I actually got the name.
Speaker A:Now if I'm looking at it in Pythagorean, I mean, I'm sorry, Chaldean R becomes the number two.
Speaker A:Both these numbers become the number one.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:And I also would say, well it adds up to the number four.
Speaker A:And they.
Speaker A:Most people would say, well Ray at work, he's a very hard worker, he's very organized.
Speaker A:Well, someone say I'm organized, but I'm a hard worker.
Speaker B:Right.
Speaker A:Four represents the number of hard work and stability foundation willing to endure.
Speaker A:And the thing about it is I've had jobs, I was a field technician for AT&T for 11 years, climbing on letters, installing DirecTV, going to addicts crawl spaces, working in all type of inclement weather.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:And so that's where that number four would appear at.
Speaker A:Now the other thing is I'll also.
Speaker A:Yeah, go a little deeper and I add these together.
Speaker A:Eight plus four equals 12, which is three.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:Which when I was at work, I would be the more I would be very positive.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:3 Represents positivity, optimism, energetic, youthfulness.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:And yeah, and I was usually when I was at jobs, I was the one who always had a positive outlook, who smiled a lot though that type of energy.
Speaker B:So you just added the number from the Chaldean and the Pythagorean to get the 3Y.
Speaker B:So you, so you was using both, both systems interchangeably.
Speaker B:Yeah, together.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:And that's even thing.
Speaker A:So I would even say that like my perspective.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:So another thing I would even look at is like this may even show, right the beginning and this may show like the, the final side of it.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:Like where you started at and where you gonna finish at is the Chaldean.
Speaker B:All right, all right.
Speaker B:Can you tell me now from on my numerology report, I saw all kind of numbers, like core number, expression number and all that.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker B:What's all that?
Speaker A:So I'm.
Speaker A:I'mma sit back down here.
Speaker B:Go ahead.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:So there in numerology there are five core numbers.
Speaker B:What's a, what's a core number?
Speaker A:It's just pretty much the basic numbers, the most known numbers in the Pythagorean system, you know, most.
Speaker A:They're going to go off.
Speaker A:The five core numbers are which.
Speaker A:Yeah, it's just pretty much the basic numbers, right?
Speaker A:The life path number, of course, the birthday number, which is the day that you're born, on the which.
Speaker A:The life path numbers is what you're here to learn.
Speaker A:The birthday number, though, that is your natural strengths, talents, gifts and characteristics.
Speaker A:The, the full name at birth called the expression number.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:That's about what you're here to teach and, and who you are as a.
Speaker A:Completely as a person.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:And then these, you got the soul urge number, which is sometimes called the heart's desire or motivation number.
Speaker A:Right.
Speaker A:They use different sayings, but that's about your innermost desires.
Speaker A:That's about what you truly want, what drives you, what motivates you, where you, what you're most passionate about.
Speaker A:That's taking, that's taken from the vowels in the name, right.
Speaker A:You adding up all the vowels in the name.
Speaker A:Now, the person out of the, the last number is the personality number.
Speaker A:This is the number where you may not feel like this person, but this is the image that you project.
Speaker A:Meaning, this is how people view you.
Speaker A:Again, you don't have, you don't.
Speaker A:You may not think this is about you, but when people encounter you, this is how people view you.
Speaker B:And so that would be equivalent to the rising sun or ascending in astrology.
Speaker A:Yeah.
Speaker A:So.
Speaker A:And that's taking it.
Speaker A:That's taken from the consonants in the name.
Speaker B:The consonants, all right.
Speaker A:Yeah, the consonant.
Speaker A:So, yeah, so you got the, all the letters in the name makes the expression number, the vowels make the soul urge, and then the consonants make the personality number.
Speaker B:And, and all that matters.
Speaker B:Yeah, you look at all of that.
Speaker B:If somebody gets a consultation from you, you, you do all that?
Speaker A:Oh, yeah.
Speaker A:And this is the thing.
Speaker A:I do it in both systems too.
Speaker A:I look at them in both systems.
Speaker B:Why?
Speaker A:So it can get, makes.
Speaker A:It helps me get a better picture.
Speaker A:Most of the time it kind of had the same energy.
Speaker A:It kind of had.
Speaker A:Carry kind of the same energy.
Speaker A:But it helps me get a gauge a better picture because sometimes I have to see when I'm in these readings.
Speaker A:Not everybody wants to just sit there and, you know, even if I'm, even as I'm doing the reading, I know I'm hitting spot on, but some of these people you got to kind of chisel at to help get their wall down.
Speaker A:You know, not everybody wants to tell you something.
Speaker A:And so like, so I, I, I,.
Speaker B:You see that when you do live readings.
Speaker B:Live more, but more private readings.
Speaker B:They'll open up a little bit more to you in the private reading than online.
Speaker B:Cuz online you be making.
Speaker B:You got all their kids and dirty laundry.
Speaker A:Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker A:Now I had one recently that was a private reading and where she.
Speaker A:Yeah, I had to.
Speaker A:I had to.
Speaker A:It took me a little bit of time.
Speaker A:I had to start chiseling away like she.
Speaker A:But it kind of made sense.
Speaker A:And now in my mind I'm like, you know, that's why I have to trust my intuition.
Speaker A:I'm like, you are very hard to read.
Speaker A:And.
Speaker A:And yeah, and she was.
Speaker A:And I'm like.
Speaker A:And I had to end up telling her that at the end of the reading.
Speaker A:I'm like, hey, you are very hard to read.
Speaker A:I'm too like, yeah, you have to kind of break my guard down a little bit.
Speaker A:But it also resonated with her reading.
Speaker A:She was a very hard person to get to.
Speaker A:She was very guarded.
Speaker B:And the thing that really, really, you know, your boy, the mutual friend Sun Moon, he came in that day and tried to break that tic tac toe board thing down.
Speaker B:That's the thing that really got me interested.
Speaker B:So could you break that down for me?
Speaker B:How does that work?
Speaker B:What's going on with that?
Speaker A:So absolutely.
Speaker A:So.
